When a couple show up in my space for couple counselling, it lets me know that the couple still hold some hope for their relationship and that they really want some kind of help.
Having worked with couples since 2005, the thing I see again and again is the pain that each person is carrying individually, and their inability to see their partner in pain. This does not mean that the other does not have the ability to be empathetic and caring, it just means that “your pain hurts so much, that you can’t see your partner’s pain”.
I also see that when a couple become disconnected, the distance between them becomes greater and greater and the likelihood of attending counselling is poor. This is why I think it is so important for a couple to recognise that when something doesn’t right, or something feels uncomfortable and unsafe, it is time to reach out for support.
Couple counselling involves a process of looking deeply into the couple’s issues with the intention of supporting, understanding and resolving dysfunctional patterns within the relationship.
Communication is important in any couple relationship, but we need to look deeper than the way you communicate. I often see couples who have no idea of healthy conflict resolution. People often say to me that “I avoid conflict at all cost”. This is where counselling can help you learn about healthy conflict resolution, where you can be seen, heard and acknowledged in a way that feels safe and that builds on a supportive, caring and healthy relationship.
So many couples wish they had started couples counselling years ago. If you or your partner feel that something doesn’t feel right or that you are arguing all the time, or you feel disconnected, don’t wait years to get help, reach out and get the support you need right now.
As a couple counsellor, I understand how difficult and challenging it is when a couple are faced with a relationship that feels like it is failing. The helplessness can feel overwhelming and stand in the way of finding any kind of resolution. If you find that you are pushing your partner away, recognising a distance between you, feeling disconnected, or afraid of speaking your feelings to your partner, then it might be time to reach out and get some professional support.
Let me support you, in understanding yourself, your partner and your relationship, as we gently unpack the challenges that your relationship is facing and to also look at the love that brought you together in the first place.
You and your partner deserve to feel safe, comfortable, and loved in your relationship. Let me support you in understanding your relationship dynamics, as we identify some of the negative behaviours and patterns that are creating your relationship issues. Let me help you learn new skills that will improve the way you interact with each other.
Let me help you identify the root causes of your conflict and develop new healthier ways of relating to each other.
As part of my work as a family constellation facilitator and counsellor, I look at your family of origin and your ancestors. This kind of process, allows us to gain a deeper understanding of how your family system influences you. Working systemically, helps you to see family patterns, burdens and entanglements. Once we begin to understand the patterns that influences you, you begin to heal yourself and your relationships.
What brings a couple to therapy?
- Arguments (including fighting over parenting styles)
- Mismatched Libido
- Sexual dysfunctions
- Infidelity
- Blended families
- Poor communication
- Lack of general intimacy
- Unresolved problems and conflict
- Personal traumas
- Domestic violence
- Insecurity/Lack of Trust/Jealousy
- Parenting
- Financial problems
- Grief and loss
- Separation/Divorce
- Illness of one partner
- When one person decided to work on themselves and out grows their partner
- Family conflict (in-laws and other family members)
I do believe that when we heal ourselves, we heal our relationship and we heal our children. When we heal our self and our relationship, we heal inherited trauma by breaking the cycle. If you would like to know more about inherited trauma, I highly recommend you read “It Didn’t Start With You” by Mark Wolynn. I recommend that every adult on Earth read this book.
Counselling is so much more than talk therapy. It is an opportunity to tune into a language that we don’t often give a voice to and that is our inner world. Our inner feeling and inner thoughts. So many people avoid what they feel on the inside by trying to fix things with solution focused techniques and strategies.
My intention is to support you and your partner, where the two of you feel safe, connected, seen, heard, and understood.
COUPLE COUNSELLING APPOINTMENT IS $200.00